Posted by HG on June 21, 2007


Weren’t 5th and 6th grade great? I remember strollin’ in to class, hopped up on Coke and jolly ranchers, and ready to learn. I played sports and I even gave my all at recess but I never used steroids. I didn’t trade my caprisun and accompanying straw for corticosteroid injections. The same can’t be said for today’s youth.

The French, tired of being the butt of jokes world wide, have a plan to show the world that they’re not soft: Doping up the kids. A study that followed 2,199 French 6th graders (They couldn’t find one more kid?) for 4 years reports that 1% of the 6th graders used a doping agent. 3% of the students had used a doping agent when polled four years later. The drugs of choice are corticosteroids, salbutamol, anabolic agents, and other stimulants. 44% of the kids polled credit PEDs, mainly stimulants, for their winning.

This is bad for a number of reasons. The biggest reason is that now whenever a kid knocks on my door selling candy or the girl scouts are posted up outside the grocery store, I have to buy something. I’m not gonna wanna risk getting beat down by some roid ragin’ pre-teen.

Here’s an easy way for kids to get “the clear and the cream”.

If you do the “no homo” thing, then NO HOMO, but here’s a good reason kids should think twice about the juice.

I hope that dude’s “just kidding”. Sadly, I don’t think he is.

Study: 11 year-old Athletes Using Doping Drugs. Courtesy of Fox News

Study: Performance Enhancing Drugs on the Rise in Middle School. Courtesy of Volunteer TV


3 Responses to “11 YEAR-OLDS ON ROIDS, WHAT’S NEXT? 10 YEAR-OLDS?”

  1. Lance Armstrong would know!

  2. Born Wisdom said

    Dude actually says, “Look at these huge nipples, man.” Wow.

    I’ve never seen someone so obsessed with himself… and I’ve seen Chad Johnson.


  3. abarclay12 said

    This is hilarious. Great title. When I have kids, I’m definitely making them do steroids. I just want what’s best for them, you know?

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